2005-06-03
[Jaws Intro Music Here]
I have this weird dream every now and then that I call "The House" dream. It's always in some huge, abandoned house that is dark and smokey and scary, but it also has these ingenious hidden rooms and secret passageways which for whatever reason turns. me. on. Seriously.
The dream is usually a pseudo-nightmare -- that is, I'm inevitably having to escape through one of these hidden passageways -- which of course is pitch black -- and when I'm not thinking THERE ARE SPIDERS FUCKING EVERYWHERE IN HERE AND I CAN'T SEE THEM I am afraid of The Bad Man who is trying to get me, but overshadowing both of these fears is my total geeky delight in being in a secret passage.
What the Nancy Drew fuck is up with that?
The other night I did have a Solid Gold Nightmare, the kind you wake up from still half asleep, standing in front of the open window because you hear your cat wailing to come in, and you start pawing uselessly at the window sobbing, "I can't find the door. We're locked in. Where is the door?"
HB said something comforting like "Honey. You're dreaming. And maybe you should stop dropping acid before you go to bed."
Solid gold advice.
The funny thing is that -- and anyone who lives with someone knows this -- even when you are sleeping right next to someone -- even someone a strapping 6'1" tall and 190 lbs -- when you have a nightmare it is still scarier than all getout, and other than reassuring you that there IS a door and holding your quivering body during the post-nightmare-recovery period, the person lying next to you is not much of a protector for the subconscious boogey man.
On the other had, when I haven't dropped acid or consumed 900 ml of wine before bed, I can mess around with my subconcious. I've actually been able to "talk myself out of" a nightmare, by having a stern talking to the part of my brain that is trying to convince me that Linda Blair is creeping along the floor toward our bed doing that upside down crab thing by literally saying "HA! This is a DREAM. We are ASLEEP here, so don't try to pull that 'Linda Blair upside down crab thing' on ME, skippy. Now, hows about we plug in the 'Stuart Townsend as The Plumber' dream, mmmmmkay?"
It works! Try it!
The other dream it works on is the "Oh shit. I am in college. It is finals week. I have a Chemistry Final in 1 hour. I have never been to my Chemistry class, ever. I need to pass this final to graduate. I am so totally fucked. My Dad is going to kill me. I am going to be working at Taco Bell." Dream.
When I figure out it's just a dream Stuart and I scream out of campus in my red convertable and smoke pot and mash at the lake until finals are over.
But when I wake up, I admit that I make it a POINT to look at my diploma to make sure it's still there, before donning my Taco Bell uniform for work.
(True fact: I made it through all of college AND High School without EVER taking one single minute of Chemistry. I still don't know how I got away with this, but it explains my "Damn. I Ain't Gradeeatin'" Dream.)
Now, tell me about one of YOUR recurring nightmares. (Just not if it's about Linda Blair doing that upside down crab thing because that freaks my shit out.)
Happy Friday!!!
xquzme at sometime today